You Know They're From Texas If....

Upon trying to figure out if the person in front of us with a car blanketed with Dallas Cowboys apparel was from Texas:

"Oh a blonde with a cigarette. Yeah, that looks Texas"

On Synonyms For Fast

"Let's do it mondo...Mondo?...Yeah I think it means fast....in some language"

Dreams

"I had a dream last night that we were bike riding and I got a charlie horse…….no, I really got a Charlie horse.  I think I was pedaling in my sleep"

Mad

"

Getting upset at me for something I said:

"You’re making my leg twitch.  I want to punch you.  Shut up"

Chair In A Magazine

"There's nowhere to put my arms."

Pennsylvania Road Construction

On shifting lanes in a construction zone:

Stefanie: "I'm not liking this"

Me: "I don't think they were seeking your approval"

Stefanie:  "They should.  I'm a customer"